DO NOT FORGET WHO MADE YOU A WIFE AND HOW TO BETTER YOUR ROLE!

“Every woman must remember that a man seek life partner but not its hostess” – unknown; “By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one. You’ll become a philosopher”- Socrates.

The Continent of North America celebrates Mother’s Day every month of May annually. Mother’s Day is the second most celebrated event next to Thanksgiving. According to Christian doctrine, a woman has to be married before making babies. In the societies we live in, especially in the advanced world we witness unmarried woman get pregnant, give birth and raise babies. They are called “Single mom’s.” Today the concept of single mom’s is getting generally accepted by the society and communities we live in. Some societal women even boast that they do not need a husband to make babies. Some women even live an alternative lifestyle and adopt children born through natural means, without a male partner.

The book of Genesis states that, “So God created man in His own image. He created them, male and female (1:27). God made man to name every creature in two’s but for man no helper was found as his complement. And God said it was not God for man to be alone. He then caused man into deep sleep and took one of his ribs and made it into woman and brought her to the man and man named her woman. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife and they become one flesh (2: 20-24). God knows how fainting our memories are that He admonishes us, “Praise the Lord, my soul, and don’t forget all His benefits: Who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases; who redeems your life from the pit and crown you with love and compassion; who satisfies your desires with good things…..” (103:2-5). Always remember and don’t forget……. . “That’s what a good wife does, keep your dreams alive even when you don’t believe anymore” – Michael J. Sullivan, Age of Myth.

From the above passages, we deduce as following: 1. God created man – male and female and instituted marriage institution. 2. God hates loneliness. 3. Man chose woman (not another man) as his wife and cleaved to her. 4. Admonishes us not to forget what He has done for us.

A man chooses a woman to be his wife – a companion and life partner. The one who made you a wife usually sooner or later makes you a mother. As women live in the contentment of happily married life, and in a contemporary society, a great number of women seem to forget who made them wives. They seem to have forgotten that except for the man who made them wife others were mere boyfriends, acquaintances, “sugar daddies,” etc. But the man you now call husband decided to make a commitment. You may have not been the most beautiful or well behaved of all the women that crossed his path, but he saw something in you that other passerby’s did not see or ignored and careless about. He decided to stick with you and make you a companion – wife not a knife. In the name of feminism, some women behave as if having a husband is meaningless venture – some slavery of sort. They have no respect for the man whom they accepted as heads and husbands. No woman respects a man except borne out of love.

Definition: A wife is commonly defined as a married woman, especially when considered in relation to her companion in marriage. A wife is a female partner in a continuing marital relationship. A wife refers to a woman. … The original meaning of the phrase “wife” as simply “woman”, but the twentieth century, and more modern statutes tend to define the rights and duties of a spouse without reference to gender.

Biblical definition of a wife: In Genesis 2:21-25 God made a woman from Adam’s rib and they became one flesh. Dr Michael Williams illustrates thus: The Hebrew word for wife is “ish-shaw,” which is the feminine form of “ish,” which means husband. Conceptually, as the woman was an extension from the man, the word for wife is also an extension of the word for man. Likewise, the English word woman denotes a man with a womb. In the Greek, the word for wife is “gyne,” which is from the root “ginomai.” It is clear from these words that a wife is a woman. As a woman, God gave her certain roles. We find those roles in Titus 2:3-5, 1 Timothy 5:14; and Proverbs 31:10-31. “No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed” – Harold MacMillan

Wife’s role to the husband: (4 critical roles – Proverbs 14:1)

According to Barbara Rainey, “The confusion in today’s culture about “roles” in marriage compels us to understand what the Bible says about the unique responsibilities God assigns to a wife. Perhaps more than at any other time in history, women today need a clear understanding of how they should relate to their husbands. In fact, the significant social changes brought about by the women’s liberation movement or feminism over the last few decades have led to such confusion that the very idea of “roles” is repugnant to some. They feel as if somehow they lose their identity and their freedom if they adhere to some type of “outdated standard.”

#1: Be a helper to your husband. While all of us are called to be helpers to others, the Bible places a special emphasis on this responsibility for wives. Genesis tells us that God realized it wasn’t good for man to be alone, and that He decided to make a “helper suitable for him” (Gen. 2:18). It is interesting to note that the Hebrew meaning of the word helper is found hereafter in the Bible to refer only to God helping Israel and the Holy Spirit as our helper. The fact that this same word is applied to a wife signifies that we women have been given tremendous power for good in our husbands’ lives. God has designed wives to help their husbands become all that God intends for them to be. “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord” (Proverbs 18:22); a prudent wife is from the Lord (19:14b)

#2: Respect your husband. In Ephesians 5:33, Paul says, ” … the wife must respect her husband.” When you respect your husband you reverence him, notice him, regard him, honor him, prefer him, and esteem him. It means valuing his opinion, admiring his wisdom and character, appreciating his commitment to you, and considering his needs and values.

Our husbands have many needs. The macho man who is self-contained, independent, and invulnerable is a myth. One day Dennis Rainey listed to her wife the primary needs most men have as: #i) Self-confidence in his personhood as a man; #ii) To be listened to; #iii) Companionship; and  #iv) To be needed. Her wife meeting these needs is what respecting your husband all is about. She boosts Dennis’s confidence, by being his number one fan, his coach when necessary, and most of all, his cheerleader. A husband needs a wife who is behind him, believing in him, appreciating him, and cheering him on as well as criticizing in love as he goes out into the world every day.

#3: Love your husband. Titus 2:4 calls for wives “to love their husbands.” ie “unconditional acceptance.” –  accept your husband just as he is—an imperfect person. Three 3 things a wife should not deny or neglect of her husband: Food, Sex and Rest (peace at home). Love also means being committed to a mutually fulfilling sexual relationship. Indeed, we must look at love from their perspective, not just our own.

Surveys show that sex is one of a man’s most important needs—if not the most important. When a wife resists intimacy, is uninterested, or is only passively interested, her husband may feel rejection. It will cut at his self-image, tear at him to the very center of his being, and create isolation. My husband’s sexual needs should be more important and higher on my priority list than menus, housework, projects, activities, and even the children. It means I save some of my energy for him. It keeps me from being selfish and living only for my own needs and wants; maintaining that focus helps me defeat isolation in our marriage.

#4: Submit to the leadership of your husband. The wife submits to her husband’s headship ( Eph 5:21-24 ; Col 3:18 ; 1 Peter 3:1-6 ). Basically it means is “to submit or subordinate to a higher authority.” – is primarily for the role of leadership that her husband occupies, not necessarily for his merits, though that would be the ideal. She recognizes the God-given leadership with regard and deference.  It is a predisposition to yield to the husband’s leadership and a willingness to follow his authority. The wife does this voluntarily neither implying she is inferior, less intelligent, nor less competent. Christ submitted to the Father but was not inferior or less God than the Father ( 1 Cor 11:3 ; 15:28 ). She does not give up independent thought but with unbelieving husbands think independently, while still submitting to their husbands ( 1 Cor 7:13-14 ). She might seek to influence her husband and to guide him in righteousness ( 1 Peter 3:1-2 ). Submission never signifies that a wife gives in to her husband’s every demand. If demands are unrighteous, she submits to her higher authority, Jesus. A wife should submit with an attitude of honor, reverence, and respect ( Psalm 45:11 ; Eph 5:33 ). A wife affirms and nurtures her husband’s leadership. She submits in the same manner that she and the church submit to Christ ( 1 Peter 3:6 ). She demonstrates a gentle and quiet spirit ( 1 Peter 3:4 ), not demanding her own way or insisting on her rights.. “That is, the wife must care for what the husband cares for if he is to remain resolute” – Mother Jones