THE PATH OF PERSONAL GROWTH AMIDST COVID-19: SELF DISCOVERY

“I think self-discovery is the greatest achievement in life, because once you discover yourself and accept what you are, then you can fulfill your true potential and be happy” – Marco Pierre White

Life is not easy; there are times when we go through adversary and believe in our everyday power or inward strength to get through it. Difficult times could be when one is experiencing challenging circumstances in life, like financial, personal or health struggles. It could refer to midlife crises, break ups, changing friendship or failures or even divorce as well as pandemic. Life is tough and unpredictable; at some point no matter how well thought you plan, there are unexpected turns or un-envisaged disruptions. The American English Dictionary defines Self discovery as a becoming aware of one’s true potentials, character, motives, etc. According to Eleni Makedonas on The Journey of Self Discovery – My Decision to Find Myself, “Self –discovery means many things. It means FINDING A PURPOSE IN LIFE. It means digging deep into your childhood and revealing the experiences that shaped you – good or bad. It means realizing what your beliefs are and living by them. The effect of self –discovery includes happiness, fulfillment, clarity and even enlightenment. The journey is not always an easy road. It includes fear, confusion, misunderstanding, doubt and literally re-visiting all your choices in life….It requires making some tough decisions and sticking to them. Such as cutting off some people – “call, takers,” set intentions, no longer having expectations of others but looking inwards for answers.” self-discovery is defined as: “a becoming aware of one’s true potential, character, motives, etc.”

“Self-discovery” is a process of acquiring insight into one’s own character /personality.  N. Pam M. S. describes, “is a process of looking for your own identity to discover what an individual has in his personality and what things are there to which a person is likely to be more inclined.” Another author says is a process of learning about you, plain and simple.” Tough times can feel like a deep dark hole that seem inescapable and could cause us to wonder why is this happening to me. This hidden truth is that as we go through tough times, that we are tested and as we pass through these test, we appear to grow, to rise above our circumstances, push through and come out on the other side stronger, braver and bet. Though nobody likes trouble and uncertainty; most times even deny our struggles, but as we pass through life, we face variety of difficult times. Those tough and challenging times cause us to look inwards into our inner life and draw inspirations, strength we can hold on to enable us overcome the ugly situation

Little wonder Aliana Stewart opines, “No matter what kind of challenges or difficulties or painful situations you go through in your life, we all have something deep within us that we can reach down and find the inner strength to get through them.” These difficulties gear us up to face it and improve how we live our lives –process of learning and growing. It could entail making best of what the world throws at us, since the situation is not under our control. We may ask questions such as: Who am I really? In reaction, Bob Edelstein, Authentic Engagement writing on Self and Self – Discovery says we have to develop the practice of listening in the moment, to what is going on inside of us – our thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, memories and dreams. He quoted Jim Bugental, PhD, a renowned Humanistic Psychotherapist who described what he termed listening practice Inward–searching as a process we all use without much awareness when pondering on a life issue and for inward searching to be truly effective and life challenging. We must listen to what is going on inside of us while maintaining an expectation of inward discovery.

During the darkest and most challenging times, we have the tendency to tap into our hidden parts that can bring light and joy to our lives. As the pandemic has changed the world and pushed people into their homes and out of these routines, it has also in many cases and to many people revealed some surprising traits within ourselves.   Leanne Italie, Associated Press writes, “The luxury of self-reflection without life’s usual distraction has taken some people elsewhere – to relationship with God, their values as workers and their shocking ability to do without people.” Some have ventured into a new field, wondering whether they would meet up the task, while others reassess the old passion struggling to improve and learn more. When I discover who I am, I’ll be free.”— Ralph Ellison, Invisible Man

You may not know that life and its distractions have a way of making us lose sight of ourselves and who we truly are. The various responsibilities life throws at you keep you busy and tempt you into thinking they are the most important things of your life. If you don’t pay attention, they will dictate and enslave you, and you will end up serving them, instead of the other way around. Until there is a sudden reawakening; you pause and re-evaluate your life, you will not know you have lost control of your life; no longer in the driver’s seat. You are like a dead fish swimming alone with the current. Surprisingly, you are not alone. Many have slept off at the wheel of our own life, and have little or no idea that we have lost control, except our burning passion awakens Startling Realization that we are lost.

So, what should we do? How can you reclaim back our lives? The answer looks simple, but not quite easy. You have to tell yourself the frank truth – brutal honesty and be ready to tow a new path (make changes); involving thoughts, emotions, actions … sets up chain of events that may take your life in a different direction. You then sow a crop of actions, thoughts and feelings that are truly your own instead of those supplied and influenced by others.    “Essentially, self-discovery is an all-encompassing journey of getting to know yourself better, what makes you tick, and how you go about life.”

Self-discovery is not an intimidating concept, but just a process of: *

• examining your life
• figuring out what’s missing
• taking steps toward fulfillment

1. Start by visualizing your ideal self: You may have been living your life according to guidelines supplied by parents, teachers, friends, and others you have relationship with, without considering the things that matter to you or the person you hope to become. It will be helpful asking yourself things like:

– What do I want from life?
– Where do I see myself in 5 or 10 years?
– What do I regret?
– What makes me proud of myself?

The answers to these questions can give you a startling revelation.

2. Explore your passions: We believe passions give life purpose and meaning. It involves identifying the job you really want. What excites you and brings joy to your life? What you enjoy and look forward to most can help you discover ways to enrich your life.

3. Try new things: Do something new and totally different. You won’t know what you enjoy until you give it a shot, right? Exploring new hobbies, especially ones you’ve never tried before. Beyond teaching you more about yourself, taking safe risks may boost your self-esteem .

4. Evaluate your skills: Take some time to consider your unique abilities and how you might use them, which can increase your confidence. Greater self-confidence will encourage you to keep exploring these talents, along with others you may not have noticed before.

5. Identify what you value about yourself: your personal values or the specific qualities are important and meaningful; speaks lot about your nature. These values help illustrate the life you desire to live as well as the behavior you expect from others. Values might include: *honesty *compassion *loyalty *creativity *courage *intelligence etc

6. Help answer these questions: *
– Why do I do the things I do?
– What drives me?
– What am I missing?
– What kind of impact do my choices have on the life I want?
These questions apply to all areas of your life. Self-discovery takes time, don’t rush your response. Above all, be brutally honest with yourself.

7. Learn something new: Learning works best when it’s treated as a lifelong process. So take time to peruse and study – books, manuals, or online tools.