As we celebrate another Month of February – “Lover’s Month,” – we wish all Happy Valentine. God is love and all creation deserves love. Even those who may have no human figure to wish or share this moment with them, they should not forget that their heavenly Father loves and cares about them inestimably and unconditionally. Some may feel neglected, abandoned and rejected yet their Maker stands with them and remains faithfully, trustfully and dependable. The more reason we have decided to reflect on Jesus’ advice to His disciples and followers – “Love one another.”
We live in an environment that is polluted with shreds of evidence of hatred, malice, grudges, greed, and ego, etc. Daily we hear songs of war, killings, molestation, rape and other vices. In the Middle East, we hear names like Al Qaeda, Isis, Islamic terrorist jihadist, etc. In Nigeria, Boko Haram, Fulani herdsmen, kidnappers – bakacy killings, burning houses and people alive as well as exploiting and threatening people everywhere.
John 10:10 – The thief comes to steal, kill and destroy, yet we hear people say “I love you”
- bear love as a name,
- wear it as necklaces and earrings,
- wear it as label & lapel pin,
- wear it as Christian t-shirts,
- put on as a car sticker and bumper stickers,
- post it on facebook, twitter, and on Whatsapp.
Hate is the opposite of love and vice versa.
John 13:34-35:
Jesus said, “A new commandment I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you so you must love one another. By this shall all men know that you are my disciples if you love one to another?”
Christian love distinguishes believers from the rest of the world.
Acts 2:44-47: When love is demonstrated people willingly join in fellowship and the Church grows.
People do not care the much you talk, but how you make them feel, your behavior and action. Talk is cheap but action underlined by love is not.
The church is a community of love in action. Why then do we have so much strive, quarrels, in-fighting, corruptions, fornication, adultery, hate, gossip, and slanders etc in the Church?
Brethren, you do not need to wear it all over you, sing and bear it as name and put it on a sticker, wear the shirts, necklace when you do not mean it. All these outward signs, statement of faith are good but there’s something more and better. The proof of discipleship is based on action; I mean, doing. By what you do, how you behave, all people will know you are a Christian.
The greatest commandment in Mathew 22: 36-40, Jesus says, “You shall love the Lord, your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with your entire mind. The second, you shall love your neighbor as yourself. Romans 13:8-10 says “Let no debt remain outstanding except the continuing debt to love one another for he who loves his fellow man has fulfilled the law.” The commandments, “Do not commit adultery,” “Do not murder,” “Do not steal,” “Do not covet,” and whatever other commandments there may be, are summed up in this rule: Love your neighbor as yourself. Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.” Also Read Romans 12:9-21.
a).Jesus knew many people do not love themselves: i. They hate who they are; ii. How they look (black prefer white; flat nose prefer pointed nose, etc); iii. They hate where they were born (of African heritage prefer advanced world); iv. Some born to poor parents prefer being born by rich and multi wealthy parents; v. Some do not like who they married or married to (Keep looking outside for a perfect spouse that does not exist anyway. Always thinking their former girl/man would have been a better choice).
b). Also, Jesus knew that a time will come: i. When iniquity shall abound and the love of many shall wax cold (Matt 24:12); ii. We shall live in the days of abounding iniquity and dwindling love; iii. We shall live in the world that is Sin Sick; iv. When the Church shall become worldly and the world so churchy – you can’t differentiate the two – 1 John 2:15-16. All we have in this era is self-fulfillment and self–aggrandizement. V. When erotic love (romance, kiss and sex) has covered the world spectrum of life and being preferred to God’s agape (compassionate, unconditional) love.
- Some did not grow up in the right kind of love relationship and all they saw and know is Ero and phillo or sexy kind of relationship. Some grew up seeing their parent fighting every day.All they have seen and known is abuse, hate, greed and cheating, revenge and kill.
That’s why when someone says “I love you” you string back because the person may have no idea what he/she is talking about. Some may shower praises and give you flower in the morning and shoot you dead in the night time.
That is why Apostle Paul wrote, “But covet earnestly the best gifts; and yet I show unto you a more excellent way (1 Corinthians 12:31 -13:1ff).
Jesus gave a new commandment: That you love one another as I love you (John13:34-35).
1John 4:7-11 summed:
- Love one another
- Everyone who loves is born of God and knows God
iii. God is love
- He sent His Son to die for us and we may live through Him.
- He paid for our sins with His life
- Because God loves us, we ought to love one another.
Implications:
- To love is a commandment not a suggestion (Due 32:46-47).
- Real love comes from God because God is love: Real love is selfless and sacrificial.
- Real love manifest in us that we are children of God – born of God (E.g.: As your Master washes your feet, you also wash one another’s feet (John13:14); as I forgive you, forgive one another (Matt 6:12).
- Genuine love comes with genuine humility (Rom 12:3).
- This love gives and does not take – This love made Jesus gave His life and died the death of shame on the cross for us.
- Real love loves to the end (John 13:1); it’s also steadfast and sanctifying.
In Ephesians 5:25-26; Colossians 3:19: Apostle Paul advised, Husbands, love your wives as Christ love the Church. He gave himself to her. He did it to make her holy. He made her clean by washing her with water and with the word.
Washing with water: not only to cleanse but to refresh, relax, renew, restore and got her a foot massage (John 13:4-5). When the foot is hurt, it affects the whole body. When you clean her, you polish her with better lotion/cream and spray on cologne /perfume – to make her smell good and look feminine (attractive and desirable) and cloth her. An African proverb says, “better soup na money kill am.”
Washing with the word: bless her and admonish her and pray for her. Proclaim and prophesize over her with the word of God. Deal with her in wisdom and understanding. (1 Peter 3:7). E.g. May God blesses you and increases you and makes you the best wife, humbled, respectful and submissive. He will turn all the tests /struggles you go through into testimony. God will open new doors and breakthrough for you; increase you in wisdom and favor for putting up with me as my wife, companion, mother to my children and home keeper. I pronounce anointing to break satanic yokes and may God put sweetness and melody into this marriage. She is not foot mate for matching or football for kicking; she is a queen to be admired, desired and appreciated.
Wife: Respect your husband in all things (Eph 5:22, 33; 1 Peter 3:1-6):
Respect includes: reverence, high regard, notice, and honor; prefer, venerate and esteem your husband.
- You cannot respect someone you do not love; it does not matter whether he’s right or his views are in error – show respect as unto the Lord.
- When you respect someone, you value his opinion, admire his wisdom, cherish his character and fancies, appreciate his commitment to you and your children and consider his needs and values.
- Avoid lukewarmness, and coldness at all cost, complacency and talking him down as well as taking his love for granted. Keep you love hot all the time; look cheerful, appetizing and enviable.
- Loving your husband means unconditional acceptance.
- Understand that nagging may worsen your situation – avoid comparing him to other men or notes with other women. Other women may say “I will not take it” but they take the worst situation in their homes and keep their secret.
- Do not desist intimacy, the man may feel rejected and could result in isolation (living lonely together) – 1Cor. 7:1-5 – prone to temptations!!!
- Titus 2:5 – It was so important and necessary that old women were advised to admonish the young women to love their husbands and children.
Eph 5:22; Col 3:18: wives submit to your husband’s as unto the Lord: Husbands are heads of the wives 1 Cor. 11:3, 7-8; Col 3:18.
- It means be willing to come under the authority of your husband as head. It’s the duty of the head to give direction to the body.
- It does not matter whether you make more income than your husband or has a chain of degrees or you came from a rich family, etc.
- Your desire shall be for your husband and he shall rule over you (as Christ rule over the Church, in love).
The word submission is a good word but some people have simply defined it wrong.
It takes the amazing grace of God to become a submissive wife to an imperfect man, who is abusive or lived in incessant disagreements and quarrels – who always insists his way or no way.
- Submission excludes staying under continuous abusive or life-threatening condition. You need to take steps to rescue and protect yourself and children.
- Submission does not mean you become a doormat or indefinitely tolerate the significant destructive behavior.
- Some women had remained too long under abusive situations that they do not know what it takes and means to be free. It’s either due to lack of jobs, certification for job and immigration authorization, fear of harm to self and children or religiosity and what people will say as well as the muscles to challenge the status quo.
- It is also unbelievably true that some men suffer abuses from their wives: emotional, verbal, denials of love and sex and sometimes physical.
- Abuse is criminal; do not hide or tolerate it. Once it starts and is not curbed, the tendency it shall continue, perhaps until it results in injuries and death.
No human being is born with the love of God. We are born as sinners – full of greed, hatred, malice, selfishness, un-forgiveness, grudges, lustful and revengeful. Whatsoever love we have depends on what we were born into and what we saw while growing up. Some are like Microwave love – heat it and when you bring it out, it gets cold.
True love comes to us by the spirit of God when we are born of God or Born again. When we get born of God, our inner minds/hearts are renewed and the old things are passed away. Nobody denies there did not exist but in the eyes of God, there have been washed away: forgiven and forgotten – remember them no more. Isn’t that awesome? Praise the Lord!!!
It’s the spirit man that got born again not the flesh. As we infill our hearts/minds daily with the word of God, in fellowship and in worship, the spirit man is strengthened and renewed and develop our faith and overcome the flesh (body) and we become spiritual.
Even when we are born again and we do not feed our soul on the word and bath in His Spirit, the minds are not renewed and the tendency we go back to our mess and the Spirit man become silent – we get back to our old ways and fall back to sin.
This explains why we see some who claim to be born again behave and live like they are not or “born against.” Born again is not a certificate of achievement or status symbol but a process. In this covenant, God by His spirit has done His part, you have to do your part to make it work.
With the Holy Spirit in you, you unlearn the old stuff and learn new ways of unconditional love.
If you are reading this piece today and you are not yet born again or you’re not sure of your salvation or though born again but have fallen back into old ways – like a dog back to its vomit, you have an opportunity this moment to get saved. Do not be ashamed, as a matter of fact, there is nothing to be ashamed of. Some of us had similar experiences and this great God gave us another chance.
If we say we are believers and still walk in sin, the life of Christ is not in us; we still live in trespasses of sin.
Brethren I plead with you passionately this day to make a decision for Christ; to accept Jesus as your personal Savior and Lord of your life.
LET US PRAY: Put your right hand on your chest and repeat after me: Oh God, I am a sinner. I am sorry for my sins. I want to turn from sins. Please forgive me. I believe Jesus Christ is your Son; I believe He died on the cross for my sins and you raised Him to life. I want to trust Him as a Savior and follow Him as my Lord from this day forward, forevermore.
Lord Jesus, I put my trust in you and surrender my life to you. Please come into my life and fill me with your Holy Spirit in Jesus name, Amen.
If you just said that prayer and mean it, with all your heart,
we believe you just got saved and are now born again
in Christ Jesus as a totally new person (2 Corinthians 5:17).